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It's all about communicating with women in a fun, easy, and genuine manner, which will seriously increase your attraction!
First impressions are important. And if you want to create an enjoyable social life for yourself, populated with interesting, attractive people who think that you're the best thing since sliced bread, then you should know how to create a first impression that's going to do you justice.
So, with that in mind, here are the three most effective ways for you to cultivate a great first impression in a way that's going to showcase your good points and show everyone just how attractive and interesting you are.
Always Be Interested In Them
This is the number-one rule of socializing. Dale Carnegie, author of
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" says that there is nothing quite so flattering to others as your exclusive attention.
Here's a fact for you, people will always be far more interested in themselves than they are in you. You will make more friends in 2 months by taking an interest in others than you will in 2 years by trying to interest others in you.
Really, it all boils down to being a good listener. Most people fail to make a good impression on others because they're too interested in thinking about what they themselves are going to say next. They're not listening to what's being said. They're not really interested in the other person at all. They're merely interested in that person as a receptor for their own witticisms and pithy one-liners.
Being a good listener is especially important when it comes to
conversing with women. Take a moment to consider how different the sexes are in terms of communication.
Men frequently enjoy competing amongst themselves. They interrupt one another as a form of dominance, to show who is the "alpha male". They compete over who is the most knowledgeable, who is the funniest, who has the most to say on any given topic, etc.
Women, on the other hand, express respect and liking for one another by showing intense personal interest in what other people have to say. Where a man will strive to inject his own note into the conversation and "put in his two cents' worth", a woman will show good manners and affection for her conversational partner by listening to what that person has to say.
If you want to make a good first impression (score big points) with a woman, shut out all other distractions and focus yourself 100% on her and what she is saying to you.
Always ask questions
Most women are accustomed to taking a guiding role in a conversation. They do this by suggesting conversational topics to the person they're speaking with quite simply, they ask plenty of questions. Well mannered women will ask questions about topics that they sense the other person holds dear.
Women are accustomed to asking plenty of questions and listening interestedly to the answers. Even if the answer doesn't particularly interest them on a genuine level, they will still smile and nod as if they are interested, because that's what a well bred, classy woman will do.
Danger!! This is where most men screw up. They mistake this classiness for genuine interest and they get so tied up in the pleasure of being questioned thoroughly on a subject close to their hearts, by a person who appears to be completely fascinated by what they have to say, that they forget to return the favor. Most men lose the interest of the woman they are speaking to by being a self-centered conversationalist.
If you want women to love talking to you, then surprise them. Show them that you are unlike 99% of the other men out there, and take an active interest in her. Match her question for question. And if you truely want a positive first impression, take a "feminine" role in the conversation and guide the conversation yourself. Ask her all about herself. She'll be fascinated and she won't be able to resist coming back for more.
Don't Out-Alpha Other Men
Let's say you see one (or two, or three ...) really attractive females in a group when you're out and about one night. You want to go over and introduce yourself, maybe strike up a conversation. However, there's a fly in the ointment, they're standing in a group of other men.
You're not sure if these men are interested in the women in the same way that you are ... but you're not taking any chances. You don't want any competition for these women. You want to get rid of these men, and right now. So you decide to take action.
You march over and insert yourself into the group, angling yourself between one of the women and her male friends. You introduce yourself. You say hello to the women but as part of your plan to alienate the men and eradicate potential competition, you don't make any social overtures to the men whatsoever. You're hoping that your message will sound itself loud and clear:
"I'm taking over here. There's no room for you. Go away." Please, tell me you've never made this mistake!
This is a huge, huge social fumble to commit (bad first impression). Not only will it raise the men's hackles (because let's face it, only a man with really low self-esteem would permit himself to be humiliated in this manner). This kind of blunder will also drive the woman away.
Mind Your Manners!
A woman isn't going to be pleased that you're being rude to other members of her group. She isn't going to be flattered or happy because you can't get on with the other men in her life. She wants to know that you're going to make her life better than it already was. She wants to be able to receive reinforcement from her friends about what a great guy you are. Not only will that make her feel certain of her feelings towards you, but it will also increase her own social value. Dating a man who's popular will raise her social status among her friends.
If you want to make a good first impression, then focus on her friends! Show that you're going to be an asset in her life, not someone who's going to alienate her from her social circle.
Be Friendly to Her Group
The more attention you pay to the group that she's with, the better off you will be. Through paying attention to her group, you're showing that you respect her and you'll also make friends and allies out of people who could potentially have been competitors.
If a woman is with a group, never focus on her to the exclusion of others. Focus on everyone in that group, and you will make a fabulous first impression on her buddies and on her ( then she can get the added reinforcement from her friends, later on, about what a stand-up guy you are).
Set out to make friends with everyone she's hanging out with, she'll be a lot more receptive to your overtures with the blessing of her friends.
These are just three of the ways that you can make a
great first impression with women. And the best part is, these rules don't just apply to women! They apply to everyone. You can use them to increase your ratings with females, or to make more friends, or to do better in business situations, or just to make yourself well liked in general.
To find out the full scope of what you need to do to create an unstoppably attractive first impression, you should read the book "Conversation Chemistry". It's available now at:
MeetYourSweet.com
Image via WikipediaWhy does anyone ever pay attention to anything and what causes a woman to give someone or something her attention?
